I just wanted to write “Thank You” for always supporting me on my quest in self discovery and on my journey in helping others. I really appreciate all the love and the daily visitors that I have been getting You have no idea how much that means to me.
To be honest, I have been feeling lost and disenchanted as of late. I began this journey to help begin my future of self – fulfillment and happiness but I have hit some road blocks along the way. I have begun to question if this is all worth it and if this is my ultimate path in life. I mean, I want it to be, I truly do but I am beginning to doubt myself tremendously. I have been trying to pick myself out of this hole, with some days being better than others. But overall, I have been feeling like I should give up.
For the last fourteen years of my life, I have been defined by my role as a teacher. I was a leader at my previous school in coaching new teachers and I even won the biggest teaching award that New York City had to offer: Big Apple Awards. This role defined me; it made everyone know who I was, but it made me know who I was. Or so I thought.
In July I officially resigned from a path that I thought I was going to be on until I was 55. This transition has really taken its toll on me and now I do not know who I am. Anyone feel the same way? At times, I am beyond sad not to go into a place where I see my beloved colleagues and my eager students, but I also know how incredibly blessed I am to be able to take a break and reset my life. I just do not know who I am anymore.
I am crying as I write this because feeling lost is something that I have always been afraid of. I always had a plan, shit, I had 50 plans in place. but now I have no net, no set path and it frightens me. I do know that I want to continue to help others while at the same time help myself (this is therapeutic after all) and I do want to continue on this journey. I just need to trust and believe in my unknown path and that the Universe has my back.
Thank you to anyone who is reading this and I hope you keep me in your thoughts and prayers. I really do appreciate everything and I hope the Universe blesses you in everything that you do. – Peace and Love